Exclusive: Art solves the world's financial problems...

So Detroit has gone bust owing $18 billion. Well, what happens when you go bust? Right. Someone takes control of what you have and sells your assets. And if you have billions of dollars worth of art? Right again - its flogged off. Detroit Institute of Arts has tens of thousands of juicy artworks. The top 40 of these could clear maybe 3 billion dollars on their own. Grab a Matisse, lever a Picasso off the walls, heave Rodin's "The Thinker" onto a truck - lets be having them - cry the debtors.
Let's face it. Detroit is a wasted, corrupt industrial area abandoned by the people who have fled in droves. So they don't need these gems - these billions of dollars worth of art, those owed the money argue. Call the cops when someone is trying to kill you - then you need to plan to settle down to fight them off for an hour before the cops roll up to check on you.
What about other cities in the US? Or the UK? Or Spain or Greece - the latter without tuppence to its name but billions upon billions worth of goodies. Let's be having their art then. Why not let the Chinese billionaires and the Brazilian industrialists or the Russian robber barons take the bloody things. Isn't feeding the kids and looking after the old and the vulnerable more important?
Then there will be oodles of space in the museums and art galleries. Acres of empty walls just waiting to be filled with the work of living, contemporary artists. The creative people who need support - the artists struggling to make a living in a world gone financially mad. And we'll need lots of people employed on this task. So that's unemployment sorted.